Jul 2, 2026
Have you ever caught yourself saying, "That's just who I am," or "I've always been this way"?
What if that story is the very thing keeping you stuck?
This week, I'm joined by business psychologist Ryann Gillen for a conversation about identity, mindset, and why lasting change has so much less to do with willpower than we've been led to believe.
While Ryann works with entrepreneurs, the ideas we discuss apply to every area of life, including your health, relationships, career, and the way you see yourself.
One of my biggest takeaways from this conversation was this: the things you think other people are judging you for are often the judgments you're already holding about yourself.
Once you hear Ryann explain it, you'll never look at self-talk the same way again.
We also unpack why "just try harder" is terrible advice for most women. If you've convinced yourself you're a bad sleeper, an emotional eater, or someone who just isn't consistent, your brain will keep looking for evidence that those stories are true.
In this episode, we discuss:
- Why hustle and alignment aren't actually opposites
- When moving the goalpost is healthy, and when it's driven by fear
- Why regulating your nervous system comes before changing your habits
- How your identity shapes your behaviors and ultimately your results
- Practical ways to start rewriting the stories you've been telling yourself
If you've ever wondered why knowing what to do isn't the same as
actually doing it, this episode is for you.
Links
TikTok:
Ryann | Business Therapist on
TikTok
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/ryanngillen
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/ryanngillen
YouTube:
Ryann
Gillen
Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitgirlmagic
Tik Tok https://www.tiktok.com/@kimbarnesjefferson
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/kimjeffersoncoach/
Free Quiz
https://kimbarnesjefferson.lpages.co/fflpersonaquiz_podcast
Feet Up Summer